No one can define God! Believing in anything is an admission of having doubts by definition. Whatever the definition of God, without the unconditional love of someone, no God is going to be the substitute of the quality of someone giving unconditional loving. There is no replacement for loving, sensitive caring that gives all it can with little or no expectation of return. Miss the experience of the loving beauty of mothering from the heart, and unless finding it later, you will not ever be a fully loving being toward yourself or any other.
In my childhood, which was wonderful and with no significant traumas, only good memories remain. My father worked a lot, but participated with the 6 of us kids almost daily. The first two years of my life were spent mainly with my teenage mother as the oldest child. If I had a complaint about her mothering, I’d have to make it up. Oddly, she never said, ‘I love you’ but her actions expressed only that. Mothering, like ‘saying you believe in God’, is an everyday action that doesn’t need to be put into words. Actions speak louder than words.
Erratic or incompleteness of mothering as a child is not the end and end all. ‘I love you’ is frequently said to children by their parents, but as the children reach adult age, many know that there was often an emptiness in the words more often than their hearts would like. Many parents experienced the same thing from their parents, and never ‘recovered’ the hurt from the lack of lovingness or mothering.
With a lack in quality mothering, you require inner action to focus on loving who brought you up with an understanding of why they couldn’t, and didn’t know how to give all the loving that you wanted. It’s up to you to compensate for the ‘gap’ of not enough love, and finding deeper love within yourself. That requires a conscious intent to always be rising to the highest heartfelt emotions and outlook that is available for you to reach.
You deserve to have it all! Every peak of love and mothering is available to all who let go of the disadvantages of the past, and use them with an open heart and mind to reach the available heights of knowing yourself as love. Missing out on all the love possible is a ‘trap’ of the ego and self punishment. In a way, it’s to be ‘selfish’ to yourself, and any other. The richness of full love is within, and if possible with a partner as well as life and humanity. Appreciate life in gratefulness!
