Marriage between two people is usually begun with rockets of love turning into sparklers that barely stay lit. Unconditional open communication with acceptance, and a love that stokes a fire of a reasonable form of daily excitement is paramount. If one is not excited by themselves about life and living, there is little chance of it being enough to carry an eternal flame between two people. Marriage or a coupling is about three people – a sort of ‘Ménage à trois. You, the other, and the combination of the two as ‘one’ completely forming an ‘us or we’. Two individuals without the ‘third’ is an element for disaster or certainly not the mating of souls that is what marriage should be based on.

Marriage most frequently settles into a clinic or dispensary within the ‘institution’ where each is holding the other ‘hostage’. One couple I know, like many, have settled in to working around each others issues rather than fixing them to disappear. In locking out
open communication with no fear of retribution from the other, marriage becomes a skeleton of harmony and love. People create a closet in the basement of themselves where non communicated thoughts are locked away.

Marriages last mostly because of fear of economic loss (I’ve worked my whole life for this ‘stuff’ and won’t lose it), and fear of what’s out there alone. Most have never taken the time to witness who they are, and why that’s more important than clinging to the material and ‘luke warm love’ attachments. Marital love is usually second rate at best, and frankly is for ‘losers’ who look to escape the path of personal evolvement.